Musings from a Jersey Girl: A Jersey summer survival guide

0
31


Aerial view of the beach in Ocean City. Photo courtesy of Getty Images

I know there are other things people do in the summer besides go down the Shore; but when I think about Jersey summers, my mind goes straight to the beach. The double- and triple-temperature forecasts, the sizzling sand, the funnel cakes and Ferris wheels, and dozing to the sounds of seagulls and the sea. Then it goes straight to all the nonsense we have to endure and take in stride in order to wring every possible moment of bliss out of those 99 days between Memorial Day and Labor Day. You want to enjoy yourself this summer? Accept a few facts.

You’ll sit in traffic. Everyone deals with summer Shore traffic — not just bennies like me who schlep down the GSP for a single day’s sojourn. The lucky ducks who get to live south of the bridge suffer their fair share of congestion, too, what with all the bennies pouring in and jamming up the roads. And parking? Prepare for battle. I accept that I will leave my house at 7 a.m., park 17 blocks away, and reach the sand by noon.

Incidentally, I used to be insulted by the term “bennie;” but there’s a part of me that gets it now. Namely, the part that realizes I grew up closer to Belleville than Belmar. I accept there’s a difference, but what would they do without us?

You’ll see things you can’t unsee. I hesitate to share the list of things that have hurt my eyes over the years, so let’s just say it might be a good time for folks to make their appointments for waxing and pedicures. Guys, I’m talking to you, too. Even if you’re the socks-with-sandals type, you still gotta go bare at some point. And speaking of bare — trust me on this one — thongs are not for everyone. I accept that cheeky bathing suit bottoms are no longer an option for me. You’re welcome.

 You’ll lose money and gain weight. Correction: everyone will lose money and many will gain weight. Gas, tolls, parking, beach tags, ride tickets, games of chance, skee ball, video games, pizza, fried Oreos, Kohr’s custard, cotton candy … cha-ching! And let’s face it, the majority of us aren’t stampeding at sunrise to jog the boards and burn off that deep-fried sugar fat. Let’s say this one together: We accept that we will come home with a few less Benjamins, a few more pounds, and few laps full of giant stuffed toys that cost more to win than we’d ever pay to purchase.

You’ll make the best memories. Believe me — the gridlock, the unsightly sights, the lighter checkbooks and extra pounds — none of those things are what you’ll remember when you reminisce on your Jersey summer days. (Well, I have seen some things that stuck with me, but I can laugh about it now.) In all my 60ish years, not one summer has gone by without trips down the Shore. I fished the surf with my parents at Sandy Hook as a child, traipsed the boardwalks at Point Pleasant and Seaside as a teen, partied in Bradley and Belmar as a young “adult,” found romance in Cape May as a wife, and built sandcastles with my kids in Sea Girt as a mom. The memories run as deep as the ocean, and as sure as the waves keep crashing, I’ll be there to watch them roll in. Wearing a sensible-yet-chic swimsuit and fresh pedicure, of course.

So, friends, get out there and make the most of these 99 days of Jersey summer. I can’t accept anything less!

This article originally appeared in the Summer 2024 issue of Jersey’s Best. Subscribe here for in-depth access to everything that makes the Garden State great.





Source link

LEAVE A REPLY

Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here